Srsly.

Audio Sync

Did you know, recording in 16-bit audio is suggested not only for its improved quality, but also because it will save you the hassle of rendering a 12-bit audio project to DVD. I did not know this, but now I do. Knowing this before today may've saved me numerous DVD-Rs, but alas I did not know this then and so those discs are lost forever. Had I only the foresight to look into the differences between 12 and 16-bit audio, hours of burning time might not have been aflame in vain (aFIV)! A mere four bits of audio, transferred from medium to medium, so very important. It seems almost metaphoric...metaeuphoric, even.

The issue with non-16-bit audio files seems to be that they do not export keeping video and audio in sync. Depending on the length of the film, the audio jumps ahead of the video and slowly increases that lead up to a couple seconds. This means that on a standard length motion picture (1.5 - 2.0 hours), you can watch about half of the movie before this is too annoying to continue. This is however, not a problem when just putting a movie on for ambiance. The quality of the audio isn't noticably inferior (at least to my ears). When you look at the television though, the noise will not sync up with the video. This is important to understand.

The remedy hear (misspelled for pun) seems to be converting the audio to 16-bit prior to burning. This is what I will be looking into before attempting to render another 12-bit movie to DVD again. If you know how to do this already, you should leave it in the comments. You could be helpful. You could be full of help.

podcasts and comics undt fun

BLOG FAIL ALERT:
There will be no blog today because I'm catching up on podcasts and comics, riding the bike, eating food, printing fliers, and probably not being around the home 'til late this evening.

RANDOM JOKE?
I'm going to form an homage to mid-90s pop/alternative band called "Well Enough Alone." Eventually, we'll probably be called W.E.A. By that time though, I plan to quit the band. There'll be a press release stating, "Billy to leave Well Enough Alone." I'll take a regular job and in my free time, I'll write my memoirs. I'll entitle them, "I Knew I Could."

GO TO THIS:

Going to the Movies, Part I

The following addresses a few issues I have with the movie going public, both as a fellow movie patron and as the employee of an independent theater. I should stress that the following opinions are my own, and do not reflect the views of my employer (most likely). So, you've decided to go to the movies! Here's what you should do.

Step One:
If you don't know what movie you want to see, Find out what movies are playing! This can be done on the internet, by googling "movies" and entering your zip code. This can also be done by looking at your local newspaper (unless you live in a region where this isn't true). Your last resort should be to call the theater. If you do choose to dial a movie theater, do not choose the independent film theater that actually answers their phone. Choose a Cinemark or Fridley theater, which will greet you via robo-voice. The independent film theater's workers are busy eating Chinese food and don't want to answer the phone (probably). If you've accidentally called the independent theater and bothered me (a theater employee) by asking which movies are playing, DO NOT ask what the movies are about! You're wasting everybody's time. Stop it.

Step Two:
Find out what time the movie is playing! This information will come in handy when you figure out what time to leave your house to arrive at the theater five to ten minutes before the movie's listed starting time. Showing up fifteen to twenty minutes early is too early unless you're going to a premiere. Showing up thirty minutes early is completely unacceptable. I'm inspired to treat you unkindly. This is not to suggest in any way that showing up late is OK. If you walk into the movie during the trailers, it is a mild annoyance. If you show up to your movie late, before you buy tickets you should ask "has the movie started?" If the box office clerk answers "yes," then you are not going to a movie at this time.

Turn around and leave.

Walking into a movie once it has started is INCREDIBLY annoying. You've just made me miss five minutes of the movie! I WAS HERE ON TIME! You can't enter a dark movie theater without making a show of yourself. Despite any intended politeness, you're bothering people. If you've shown up to the movie late and you absolutely must go in, remember that you have forfeited your right to concessions. They're props for further bothering people (both movie patrons and employees who have to clean up your mess). You have also forfeited decent seating as you should locate yourself in the first open seat nearest to the entrance. This will minimize the time you are bothering the responsible movie goers. Despite the fact that you're paying for your own movie experience (and maybe your significant other's), you should remain courteous to the number of other people who are better than you at movie going.

Step Three:
(continues with "Etiquette at the Theatre," next Monday)

Greg Kinnear's Galactic Love Child?

Aside from being the future name of something I'm now resolving to be a part of this year, today's title reflects a thought that raced across my mind when I noticed what I believe to be an uncanny resemblance. Lady and gentlemen, Greg Kinnear looks like Howard the Duck; or moreso, Howard the Duck looks like Greg Kinnear (Howard is younger, so Greg locked it in first). Then again, Howard the Duck premiered in 1986... Mr. Kinnear's IMDb page only goes back to 1988... How could George Lucas have known people can't resist the charms of some big blue eyes below some blonde hair... unless George Lucas was (maybe still is) a Nazi and/or supporter of the Aryan Nation. As a blonde-haired male with big blue eyes, I will assure you I have no such allegiances to any such groups. It's just a sexy coincidence.

Now to the photographic evidence!

To be read after previous post!

Releases I'm looking forward to in 2009:
02/03 - Zack and Miri Make a Porno (DVD)
02/06 - Fanboys
03/10 - Role Models (DVD)
03/13 - Miss March
03/20 - I Love You, Man
03/20 - This Side of the Truth
03/20 - The Great Buck Howard
03/27 - Adventureland
04/10 - Observe and Report
05/15 - The Brothers Bloom
06/05 - Land of the Lost
07/10 - I Love You, Beth Cooper
07/31 - Funny People
10/16 - Where the Wild Things Are
TBA - Big Fan
TBA - The Mother of Invention
TBA - Mystery Team
TBA - Paper Heart
TBA - The Slammin' Salmon
TBA - Spring Breakdown
TBA - Visioneers

Commentary is Dysentery

That title is a stretch... I'll explain as I don't think that the homophone is obvious here. What that title means to express is that commentary is decent-ary. Now, onto today's post:

I made the venture to West Des Moines yesterday to pick up a DVD at Best Buy. If you know me, releases for Tuesday, January 6th, 2009, or both me and releases for Tuesday, January 6th, 2009, then you could infer that DVD is/was Pineapple Express. Pardon that "is/was." It's deceiptful for me to suggest the DVD "was," as that would entail the movie dieing - at least this is my understanding of the English language. The whole animate versus inanimate argument is lost on me as an Agnostic. BIG WHAMMYS! NO JESUS! Anyyyyyhow {WHY THE Y's!?! [allow me to side-bar here: is there a DJ YY yet? DJ Two Y's. DJ TOO WISE! (It's me now.)]} Anyhow, having watched the movie roughly fifty times over the last couple months (thanks Internets!), one might think I'd be sick of the film... If it were any other movie of 2008, that I had access to watch at any time, and that I had also loved, this may be true. Having very little chance of guessing that, I will only judge you based on your willingness to assume. If you've seen the red band trailer for "The Slammin' Salmon," you've seen and heard Michael Clarke Duncan say "when you assume, you make an asshole out of you'self."

OK, I'll get on with it. The whole point of this entry is that I am a fan of DVD commentaries, specifically on comedy films. Listening to guys like Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, Paul Rudd, Andy Samberg, etc. chat is like having ultimate-Gawker-ears. I'm stoked to hear these guys who I admire, shoot the shit with their buddies. Sure, they're plenty aware that people like myself will hear their conversation; that doesn't take away from it to me. I enjoy the stories that led to the scenes, the random side-bars, listening to Jason Segel call out his director for not knowing what coverage is... and then hoping they'd explain it 'cuz I had no idea what they were talking about. Now, I know. It gives a guy like me, with my interests, motivation to press on in those interests. These guys' chats don't sound much different than the chats me and my friends have. Perhaps, I could write and shoot sketches and have some success at it? Neato.

This is all not-to-mention, additional special features. Gag reals, ftw.

After watching the disc-one bonus features and the movie with commentary once, I can justify the $25 I spent. I still have a whole second disc of features to watch! Srsly though, $25 is a bit ridiculous considering in three months it'll cost $15... and three months after that? Only $9. Oh welllllll [don't count these l's (no clever DJ name there)]. A couple less Chinese buffets for me. Bummer. There's only a couple other films from 2008 that I'll probably picking up my own DVD copy of. Step-Brothers and Zack and Miri Make a Porno. Oh, and Role Models! Now, to see when the last two of those come out... also, to find the release dates for The Slammin' Salmon and Land of the Lost (Will Ferrell can do whatever he wants here; he has Danny McBride and Jorma Taccone behind him).

DWS @ the Mews, January 30th!

Do Germans agree it's 2009?

"Hello, German acquaintance. Happy 2008!"
"NEIN!"
"Oh, right! I keep forgetting! Happy 2009!"
"NEIN!"
"Wow, you're really jazzed about it, huh?"
"NEIN!"
"Well you could've fooled me, German acquaintance. You have any big resolutions for the big new year?"
"NEIN!"
"Yeah... I don't know why I do. Nobody ever keeps 'em anyways! Am. I. Right. Slap me five!"
"NEIN!"

(Re:) Resolutions 2009
I. Operation FSB (Fat Shit Billy)
     A. NO MORE MEAT!
         1. This excludes chicken, turkey, and fish.
     B. NO MORE SODA!
         1. Unless you're sick and want Sprite, 7Up, or a refreshing Fresca.
         2. Unless you're dieing and the only thing to drink is soda.
     C. EXERCISE BIKE!
         1. Got one.
             a. Makes my balls fall asleep... really weird sensation.
         2. Use it to ride a couple miles every couple days... IT HAS AN ODOMETER!
II. Operation $S [pronounced "s dollars" (short for "save dollars")]
     A. Get a full-time day job.
         1. Good idea, huh?
     B. Get tax return.
         1. We'll see about that...
     C. Vacation to Los Angeles, CA.
         1. The future home of Billy.
             a. Scout the area for harmful bacteria?
             b. Scout the area for possible employment!
             c. See: The Ocean.
             d. Visit PrrrrtyFood
III. Operation AA (Associate of Arts)
     A. Take remaining courses to complete AA.
         1. File with other useless paperwork.
             a. Assume another $2k in debt.
IV. Operation ABDS (Always Be Doing Something)
     A. WonderTaint/Short Shorts
         1. More YouTube mash-ups for editing practice and random LAWLing.
         2. Writing, Shooting, and Editing Some Short Sketches (Erroneous Capitalization Necessary).
     B. Driving While Stupid
         1. Writing some new songs for a new EP, already named.
             a. It is hilarious.
         2. Play Skappleton 2009!
             a. Moving Mikey did it having only played one prior show.
             b. Moving Mikey did not fare well at Skappleton 2007.
     C. Shroommates
         1. Shoot first episode!
         2. Finish writing second through sixth episodes!
         3. Shoot those episodes!
     D. New Music Review Blog
         1. This idea makes me giggle.
             a. An atypically typical music blog.

Some early results? I've already eaten some beef. It was hidden in the beef/turkey chili that J&K made. THAT ESS IS DELICIOUS! Srsly. Worth it. Otherwise, I've written the first episode of Shroommates, finished a new DWS song (sans lyrics), and managed to lose a couple pounds so far in 2009. I've also managed to have a cold. Boo cold. Boo not breathing through ya' nose.

...more like bitchfork, amirite?

No post today [yesterday (Friday)].

Two new projects in the works?

Maybe only one...

THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!!

(This has absolutely nothing and everything to do with The Highlander)